Time To Think by Nancy Kline
“Perhaps the most important thing we could do with our life and with our leadership was to listen to people so expertly, to give them attention so respectfully they would begin to think for themselves, clearly and afresh.”
3 Main Messages:
What we pay attention to grows.
Giving everyone a turn increases the intelligence of groups.
The quality of your attention determines the quality of other people’s thinking.
When we live in a world of lists and external pressures, when we are constantly busy ‘doing’, it can be rare to find the time to stop and think. Yet for any of us who have walked away from a meeting / conversation / situation and come up with a much better idea or response later, we know it is true that our best ideas are rarely our first ideas.
In boardrooms, staffrooms and classrooms where the first, fast answer is valued (flash whiteboards anyone?), the pressure is on us to respond rapidly. Speed is rewarded, rather than depth. Imagine how many brilliant ideas are lost! How many realisations and learnings are missed! How many opportunities for connection and contribution are passed over!
Like every cliché, there is much truth in the old saying ‘more haste, less speed,’ which is the underlying theme of Nancy Kline’s book, Time to Think. By creating cultures and conditions where we slow down and allow people to think and give them our fullest attention, we will actually be noticing more, realising more, creating more and achieving more.
Time to Think is split into 4 main sections. The first focuses on the 10 components of a thinking environment - in other words, the theory behind the thinking. Kline writes that the best conditions for thinking are gentle, quiet and unrushed - “they are stimulating but not competitive. They are encouraging. They are paradoxically both rigorous and nimble.”
The ten components are: attention, incisive questions, equality, appreciation, ease, encouragement, feelings, information, place and diversity. Kline breaks down and explains each of these in turn, providing real life examples of them in action. She explains the thinking and research behind each of these, giving step-by-step guides which are easily implemented. Each of these taken and introduced separately would have an incredibly positive impact on the quality of thinking of others. When all are applied, the possibilities are endless!
In the second section, Kline focuses on the practical examples of how to lead meetings and develop cultures which allow for this thinking to take place. Having now led numerous meetings following Kline’s guidelines, I have seen firsthand how empowering, unifying, successful and positive her models and suggestions are. They allow for everyone to have time to think, everyone to have a voice, and everyone to feel appreciated and valued. While many conversations recently have been around creating psychological safety in the workplace, these meeting models are exactly what is needed.
One part of the process is in asking questions to provoke new awareness and create insight. Kline’s work around incisive questions is therefore hugely relevant for anyone in a coaching or mentoring role. By identifying our limiting assumptions and then turning them on their head, we are able to unlock new perceptions and new possibilities.
The third section of the book focuses on what this would look like in the health sector, in schools, offices, politics and families. It gives examples and suggestions of strategies which could be easily implemented to have a huge positive impact in each interaction.
Kline begins the book by referencing her mother, who was a wonderful listener and who brought out the best in people by making them feel fully valued. She concludes the book by sharing her example of how Lady Diana did the same. These individuals who give all of their energy and attention to one person at a time, who shine their spotlight on them and make them feel glorious and vital in the moment, draw out the best in others and make them feel seen and appreciated.
As Kline writes: “People shine not in the glow of your charisma. They shine in the light of your attention for them. It is from that that they can see their own brilliance. They shine when you remind them that they matter.” Imagine a world where this is true for everyone - imagine the time that could be saved.
